


I Miss You So

by Born2read



Category: Life with Derek
Genre: Dasey - Freeform, F/M, Future Fic, Suspense, life with derek - Freeform, lwd
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-09-23 00:41:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 19,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9632063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Born2read/pseuds/Born2read
Summary: Derek deals with the aftermath of the death of the one woman he ever truly loved. A year later he's started to get his life on track when his life shifts again and he discovers the truth behind the death of Casey. Set in the future, post college.Trying not to spoil anything, but there will be Dasey.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own anything.
> 
> Also, I thought this was longer than it turned out to be... but, yeah, here ya go.

The death was awful. The aftermath was worse. Casey was in a fatal car crash a month into their first semester of their senior year at Queens. The doctors said that it had been quick and painless. The officers had announced her DOA. Most of it was a blur to Derek, a very painful blur.

The morning of are vivid in his memory, though. The night before, too. She’d sat with him on the couch in their apartment. He had the channel on hockey and he’d gripped the remote tightly, expecting a fight. Instead she had said nothing and sat very still. He’d poked a little fun at her during the commercials and she’d smiled at him, sadly, and called him names back, but it lacked any real conviction. She sat and watched the entire game with him and when it was over she took him by surprise and threw her arms around him and gave him a hug. “Good night, Derek,” she had whispered in his ear before leaving to her room.

  
The police said it had been a hit and run by some gang, but Derek never shook the feeling that Casey had known something was coming.  
He was listed as her emergency contact so he was the one who got the call. He was also the one who had to call and tell Nora… He doesn’t really remember that call, that’s around when everything started blurring. He remembers a lot of crying and a lot of questions.

  
The funeral was held back at home and a lot of people attended. Derek took the semester off from school because he could barely keep track of what day it was, there was no way he would be able to focus on his classes. It was Nora who had asked him to speak at her funeral, and he’d agreed. That day he also remembers well.

  
_“Casey…” he looked at the picture of her they had put up next to her closed casket. She was smiling at something behind the camera, smiling at him, and his throat constricted. He had to clear his throat to continue, “Casey was passionate, brilliant, stubborn, and often times a little uptight.” He could see the worried frown on Nora’s face, but he continued, “What a lot of people didn’t know about Casey, is that she was my best friend.” He watched the frown turn into understanding and the sadness in her eyes deepen. “Anyone who spent time with us knew that we fought, all the time. Except, that was just our thing… over the years we’d developed a strong friendship. The thing…” Derek took a deep breath, his heart pounding and his eyes stinging but he’d yet to cry and he was not about to do it up here, “Casey was amazing. She pushed me to be my best self, wow that sounded cheesy, but it’s true. She knew what I was capable of and wouldn’t except anything less. Knowing Casey, I became a better person… and the thing is… the thing that I never told her, or anyone really, is I love her. She was everything to me and I never got a chance to really tell her that.” He supposed this wasn’t really the forum for admitting his feelings, but he had to let it out because it was suffocating him. The college student cleared his throat once more, “Uh, anyway. Casey was a lot of things and I just hope she knows she will be missed.”_   
_He hadn’t gone to sit with his family after speaking like he was supposed to and he didn’t stick around to watch them put her in the ground, instead Derek got in his car and he drove. All the way back to their shared apartment in Queens. That is the place where he finally cried; there, laying in her bed and staring at the ceiling._

  
Now, just past the one year mark, Derek was living in the States. He’d caught up on his courses, wanting to make Casey proud, and had managed to graduate on time (well, they let him walk the stage on time but he had to take a few summer courses to make up for the semester he lost). He was now the co-host of a morning radio show working in Seattle and living about half an hour away in Tacoma. He’d really started to adjust to his new job and new home.  
He’d just left the studio and headed across the street to the Corner Bakery Café for lunch and some coffee. He sat not really looking at anything but just generally staring when something, someone caught his eyes.

  
There was a woman standing at the counter and he could see her profile from where he was sitting. It was a profile he was familiar with seeing… the hair was black instead of a light brown but she just looked so much like Casey… The woman let out a forced laugh and it felt like his heart was stopping because she sounded so much like her. When the woman turned, collecting her folded bag of food to go he caught a glimpse of bright blue eyes before they’d turned down to face the phone screen in her hand.

  
The hair might be darker, but those eyes… He must be losing his mind, because the blue eyes he’d caught sight of were all Casey.

  
It was a minute before Derek was no longer in shock and then it occurred to him to chase after the woman and demand why she had Casey’s eyes, or the alternative to demand why Casey was here with black hair when her entire family thought she was dead. But when he’d raced outside, she was gone. He turned wildly just outside the restaurant door looking for any indication where she might have gone, but it was a rare sunny day in Seattle and there were too many people out and about. He returned to his lunch defeated and lacking appetite.  
The teenager who had served Casey was wiping down Derek’s table at any rate so he just returned to get his jacket, “Sorry, man,” the kid said, “Didn’t see your jacket, I thought you were done…”

  
“I was.” He slipped on the leather jacket and turned for the door. The teen jumped a little when Derek turned abruptly around, “That girl, that was just here. Bright blue eyes, black hair…” He felt heat rising on the back of his neck. It was ridiculous; he’d thought he’d seen Casey a few times after she died… at her funeral, on campus, but he'd been wrong every time.

  
It just felt so different this time, “Don’t even bother, man, my manager hits on her every time she comes in and she always shoots him down.” The teen shrugged and swiped at the table with the rag once more, “She’s classy about it, though, but she says she doesn’t date.”

  
Derek was still stuck on the part about ‘every time she comes’ because then there was a chance of him seeing her again. He could get a better look, maybe introduce himself, and once he was face to face with her it would be like all the other times, he’d be wrong and he could breathe again. He followed the kid to the counter, “How often does she come.”

  
The kid just shook her head, “You’re fighting a losing battle, dude, but sure give it a go.” He moved around behind the counter cleaning up, “She comes like every two weeks or so. Sometimes more. Always orders ahead, so she never stays long.”

  
Derek snatched a napkin out of the dispenser and grabbed one of the pens for signing credit card purchases, he wrote his number down and thrust it at the kid, “The next time she calls in an order, you call me.” It was not a question, he didn’t want the kid to give any room to argue.

  
It didn’t work, “I don’t know man,” he was looking at Derek suspiciously and he figured he probably sounded like a creepy stalker.

  
Heaving a large sigh, Derek put on a vulnerable face, “She just looked so much like a girl I knew in college and… I can’t let it go without knowing if it’s her or not. So, please,” he trust the napkin toward the kid again, “I work right across the street.” He pointed toward the studio.

  
“The one that got away, huh?” at least he sounded sympathetic now.

  
“Yeah, pretty much.” The kid took the napkin and Derek started to leave before a thought struck him, “What was the name, on the order?”

  
“Casey M.”

  
“You… you call me.” Derek managed in a squeak. Somehow he made it home to his apartment that night, but he was on auto-pilot after that conversation. Because if he thought, it would be of her, and if he was thinking of her, his chest would tighten and he wouldn’t be able to breathe, and he was just going to have to wait for answers.


	2. Chapter 2

After two weeks Derek was beginning to get impatient. Well, he’d been impatient before but he’d managed to resist the urge to go sit in the restaurant every day (and really seeming like a creeper) and wait to see if she came in. He was in the middle of contemplating if maybe the kid had forgotten or decided not to bother when the phone range showing an unfamiliar number.

  
“Hello?” His heart was pounding now.

  
“Hey, man, I never got your name, but your girl just ordered… at Corner Bakery.” And now his heavily pounding heart had stilled. “She’s due to pick it up in fifteen minutes.

  
“Thank you,” Derek breathed before ending the call. Another breath and then suddenly he was rushing into the studio bathroom and emptying out his stomach. When he’d exited, one of the other co-hosts on the show was standing there with a smirk.

  
“This is unusual, puking after the show.”

  
Derek just rolled his eyes and headed for the stairs, “Not now, Jason.” For whatever reason, Jason took this as an invitation to follow him down the stairs.  
“You look like crap, you okay?”

  
Derek heaved a sigh, “It’s… complicated. I’ll let you know. But I have to go.” Jason raised his eyebrows and he just shook his head in return. “Time sensitive, got to run.” He added on increasing his pace down the stairs.

  
When he came out of the building he saw her walking into the restaurant and he heaved a sigh and crossed the street ignoring the sounds of angry car horns.  
He stepped into the restaurant and she was standing in line, looking at her phone again. The kid at the register looked up at the sound of the bell and gave Derek a head nod, which Derek returned before quickly turning his eyes back to the dark haired woman. He stepped up in line behind her and was overwhelmed by the familiar scent of strawberry shampoo. Being closer to her, he could now see brown roots starting to peek out at the top of her hair.

  
She was possibly here, right in front of him and he couldn’t bring himself to open his mouth. He stepped up as it was her turn at the counter, “Brian,” her voice greeted. Derek must have looked like a frightened love-sick kid then because Brian was giving him a sympathetic smile over the woman’s shoulder—he couldn’t bring himself to think of her as Casey, not yet. “One order to go.” She reminded the teenager who quickly rang her up.

  
“Here you are, Casey.” He smiled as he handed the bag over to the woman with her back to Derek. She said her thanks and headed for the door. Derek didn’t move and then once again she was out the door before he managed to move.  
“Thanks!” he mumbled to Brian and ran for the door. This time, she was still in sight and he began to follow her. Still he couldn’t bring himself to call her name, just to see.

  
There were so many things right about her… he wasn’t ready to face disappointment. He realized, though, as they headed into a parking garage—the same parking garage he’d been parking in for a few months now—and she picked up her pace, that she might have realized he was following her.

  
Suddenly he was angry, because if it was Casey then she was alive. He had thought she was dead. Her entire family thought she was dead and here she was ordering food at a Corner Bakery and smiling at the employees. He hadn’t realized he’d picked up his pace as well. He was so busy fuming that he didn’t realize she’d slowed down until they were just a foot apart and suddenly she turned spraying him in the face.

  
His eyes were suddenly on fire and he was doubling over, holding his hands to them until he felt a heavy kick to the family jewels and then he was covering those instead. “What the fuck,” he managed in a gasp, coughing up the rest of the pepper spray that was in the air.

  
The foot headed toward him stopped and planted itself firmly on the ground and then, sounding confused and frustrated, she said his name, “Derek?” Then she hissed at him and shoved his arm, “What are you doing here and why were you following me?” Her hand was delicate now as she took his shoulder and helped him into the car that she’d stopped in front of.


	3. Chapter 3

She drove him to an emergency room where she explained to the nurse that she had mistakenly sprayed this stranger in the face. The nurse was unsympathetic as she treated Derek’s eyes but he didn’t care. Casey was still sitting there, shoulders tight as she watched on. Her lips were pursed in an expression he was familiar with and he was feeling so many emotions at once; he was angry that she’d pretended not to know him once they were at the nurses station and angry that he’d thought her dead all this time, he was relieved to find her alive and proud of her for being able to kick his ass, and confused about all of it. 

She hadn’t said a word to him since explaining where she was taking him so he’d kept silent. She’d asked what _he_ was doing there. 

When the nurse had finished flushing his eyes and cleaning his face as best she could she asked Casey if she would like to leave now, “Oh, no thank you. I drove him here, I should probably drive him back to his car.” 

“This man should not be driving for the rest of the day. His eyes are going to be irritated for a while.” 

“Well,” Casey was thinking and then she sighed, “I will get him back to his car and help him find a ride home. I did cause all this, after all.” She added. Again, the nurse seemed intent on blaming him because she just huffed and headed out of the room to get him a prescription for saline drops… or something like that. 

He was paying more attention to Casey than to what the nurse was saying, “Case,” he started, voice breaking. 

She shook her head and looked up to meet his eyes. They were guarded, “In the car, okay?” she told him and he nodded. He only agreed because it was probably better that they were alone for whatever conversation they were going to have and because that guarded look was unfamiliar to him. He was used to her being an open book but now she had secrets and she was better at keeping them. 

Her brows were creased with worry, too, and she kept peeking out the blinds of the window and up at the little window on the clinic room door. “What—“ but she cut him off with her hand and he huffed grumpily. 

“I’ll explain. Just… not yet.” Her blue eyes were pleading with him and so he acquiesced. They sat in silence until the nurse came back with his prescription and baseline instructions that the pharmacist will, once again, cover. He was watching Casey who was mentally taking notes—he could practically see the wheels turning—and  then shaking her head… because she’s not going to be there to enforce the doctors instructions? 

Together they walked to Casey’s car, a black Acura MDX, and when they were safely buckled in and on the road she spoke, “How did you find me?” 

“Oh no, Casey, you don’t get to ask questions here. Not when you’re sitting there driving a car when you’re supposed to be dead.” He snapped and watched as she cringed a little.  

“Derek, I promise, we can talk, I will explain, but it’s important. I have to know how you found me.” 

“I didn’t.” 

“Derek,” she warned. 

“I didn’t. I saw you, by accident,” and then, just in case, he lied, “I was in the area for an errand stopped by for lunch and there was… you, only I wasn’t sure,” he gestured to her hair, “but your eyes…” 

The tight shoulders relaxed and then he watched color return to her knuckled as her grip relaxed, “So you weren’t looking for me?” 

He shook his head, perplexed, “No, I thought you were dead.”  She let out a sigh of relief and he grunted. “Your mom thinks your dead,” he snapped, “Lizzie. Marti, Edwin, my dad, Emily, they all think you’re dead and you’re here _relieved_ that we all thought this?” 

He glared at her profile and watched as the muscle in her jaw twitched as she clenched her teeth, “That’s not it.” She said quietly. Casey pulled into a parking spot and he realized they were back at the parking garage already. Had it really been such a short ride to the ER earlier? 

She turned in her seat and faced him. She had the same look she would give him when she was about to cry, except, there were no tears welling up in her eyes. This Casey was hardened, had learned to keep her emotions in check… “For all intents and purposes, Derek, Casey McDonald is dead and it is best that she stay that way.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Derek, if anyone finds out that I’m still alive, it would put our whole family in danger. It kills me every day that I had to leave and that I couldn’t just put distance but I had to make everyone think I had died, but I had to.” She stopped again for another deep breath, steadying herself, “There was a shooting about a week before I ‘died’. A gang leader, or something, killed an undercover cop during a drug deal. Up until then, there had been no witnesses to tie this particular person to any crime but he’s involved in… everything. But, there happened to be a college student, in the wrong place at the right time who saw something.” 

“You’re in Witness Protection,” Derek interrupted in a whisper. 

She nodded in affirmation, looking her step-brother dead in the eye, “If I hadn’t died then everyone would have been in danger and I couldn’t ask everyone to uproot their lives with me… I did what I needed to do in the best way I could manage. I know it hurt people, but they were also to continue on with their lives.” The smile she gave him was sad. 

“I would have come with you.” 

She was already shaking her head, “I know, but I couldn’t ask that of you. You needed to live your life, meet a girl, and not be tied to me forever living a different life.” She blew out a breath and pulled a face, “I shouldn’t even be telling you this. I’m not supposed to be telling you this, but you are here and I’ve missed everyone… I’ve written so many letters that I’ve had to keep…” 

He wanted to reach out, to take her hand, but he kept it limp in his lap, “Derek, I can’t… we can’t… If my handler finds out that you’ve found me then I’ll be uprooted again, I’ll have to change my name, again.” 

“I can’t be in the same city with you and know you’re alive and… not do anything, not see you, pretend that you don’t exist.” 

“You have to. I… I don’t want to see you,” her jaw was set and determined, but it was the quick flicker of eyes to the left that gave her away. She could say she didn’t want him around, but he knew her better. 

“Casey…” This time he did reach for her and her expression softened. 

She chewed on her bottom lip, trying to come to some sort of decision. From her purse she dug out a little notebook. The slip of paper she handed him contained an e-mail and password, “Read the drafts…” Then she clicked the lock button and his door unlocked, “but as far as you are concerned, I’m still dead… It was nice seeing you, though.” She squeezed his hand and then shoved his shoulder gently so he’d leave… she was gone before he even made it to his car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone reading Life With Casey's Boyfriend, I not given up on it. I just haven't had a chance to type up what I've got written out. Don't give up on me. :)


	4. Chapter 4

_Mom, I wish I could tell you I was safe, I wish I could tell you not to worry, I wish I could see you one last time. I miss you, I love you. I hope you’re doing well._

_Love,_

_CM_

_~_

_Lizzie, I can’t explain why I had to go and I hate that I’ll probably never see your high school graduation or watch you choose what college you’ll be in. I’ll miss you always and I’m sorry it had to be this way. I just wanted to keep you safe._

_Love,_

_CM_

_~_

_Derek, I miss you, I wish I could see you again._

_Love,_

_CM_

_~_

There were more letters, she had written every single day. Sometimes to Nora or Lizzie, or even Marti, Edwin, and his dad. More often than not, though, the letters were addressed to him. Sometimes it was like that first letter, short and sweet telling him she missed him. Other times she had shared something that she thought he would be amused by, or laugh at her for. She was probably lonely because she never mentioned a friend or lover. Sometimes she’d mention a co-worker, in passing, but nothing indicated that she’d grown close to anyone since living here.

She also never noted where she was, specifically or where it was she worked, or even what it was she did there. When he refreshed the page, there was a new e-mail in the drafts.

~

_D-_

_It was nice seeing you, I miss my best friend. Sorry about the pepper spray. I hope you can forgive me for letting you, and everyone else, think I was dead but they convinced me it was best for my safety and all of yours. I’ll be deleting this account in a few days… I wish I knew what was going on in your life, what you were up to, why you’re here, but it was hard enough leaving the first time._

_Knowing anything more and I wouldn’t be able to resist coming to see you. And if my handler sees you around then she’s going to want to move me, just to be safe. I’m really, truly sorry. I hope, otherwise, all is well._

_CM_

~

Derek cursed out loud and slammed his hand on the table. He wasn’t going to lose her, again, but he didn’t want to put her in danger. He wrote back quickly, hoping that she would look.

~

_C-_

_Does it really have to be this way? Can’t I get to know you as Casey M (what does it even stand for anyway, I know not what it used to)? I’ve missed you… I can go into WP, too, Don’t shut me out, please._

_DV_

_~_

Although he kept refreshing the page every five minutes, there wasn’t a reply for the rest of the night. His sleep was restless and his dreams were filled with Casey. She was running and he was trying to catch up, but she just kept looking back over her shoulder, scared and sad.

When he woke up it was close to three in the morning, he’d been asleep for only four hours, but he felt wide awake and his back was drenched in sweat. His laptop was still open, asleep, and he ran his fingers across the mouse pad to wake it up. Typing in his password he pulled up the e-mail once more, not expecting anything, but there was a reply.

~

_D- I won’t take away your life. You would have to change your name, your job, move… and you would live the rest of your life in a lie. You could meet someone and get married and never be able to tell them who you really are, introduce them to the family… and Mom and George can’t lose another child. Marti couldn’t lose you. I’m sorry, but this is how it has to be. I have several months before I testify, and even after that I’d still be in danger. As long as I stay with this, I am safe. If I decide to get out—think about what that would do to my parents, knowing how you felt when you found out—I would forever be in danger and so would your family. I’m sorry._

_CM_

_p.s. I can’t tell you. It would make it easier for you to find me._

_~_

He was being selfish, of course, and she’d said it without actually saying it. She had to go into hiding for her safety and to protect her family. He just wanted to be with her, damned the consequences. And obviously she didn’t get that he wasn’t looking to settle down with anyone else… she’d always been so obtuse.

It was in the shower that he came up with the idea. Part of them being them is that neither could back down from a challenge from the other. He would just have to antagonize her just enough that she’d have to keep replying. It would buy him some time to figure out how to convince her to let him be with her and convince her that he was in love with her. A lot had changed in the year that she’d been gone, but that hadn’t changed. After his shower, before he’d even changed, he wrote back.

_~_

_C- Since when do I ever do what you want?_

_DV_

_p.s. I’m a radio personality now._

_~_

He didn’t think she’d be awake, but he still refreshed the page was surprised to see a new message in the drafts.

_~_

_Derek, I told you I didn’t want to know anything else. Please, just let it go._

_C._

_p.s. I am going to deactivate this account, now, because I don’t trust you to follow the rules._

_~_

_Spacey, You always have to get the last word, don’t you? You also always want to be the one to lay down the rules. I’m telling you, we can make this work._

_D._

_p.s. Have you thought about going red, or blonde? You know I love blondes._

_~_

He could picture her fuming and knowing that if he’d said that to her face she’d break his name in half in that familiar and that brought a smile to his face. He worked quickly, now, to change the settings so that her e-mail had a new password for the next time she refreshed. It was something stupid he would have done in the past, anyway, and he wasn’t ready to lose all those letters detailing some bit of Casey’s life. He knew, too, that she would not be able to give all those up, either, and the fact that he’d had the last word (because then he logged in and checked that she hadn’t got another reply in) that she would justify to herself, coming to yell at him. She had always bent her rules in the past when it came to him.


	5. Chapter 5

He was actually impressed; it only took Casey two days to find out where he worked and show up in the lobby.

  
He was talking to Jason and headed out the building when he caught sight of a familiar blonde wig waiting in the lobby, foot tapping impatiently. Jason let out a low whistle and whispered to Derek, “Dibs,” before sauntering toward her.

  
Casey looked up at the tall blonde haired male walking up to her and Derek saw her mouth set in a firm line, “Hey, beautiful.” He started. Derek saw her eyes flicker upward as she prevented her eyes from rolling. She offered Jason a tight smile and then scanned the lobby before spotting Derek.

  
He was probably imaging the warmth in her eyes when she spotted him, because it was gone a second later when she’d jumped up from the leather chair. “Derek.” She growled at him, skirting right past Jason who looked intrigued and a little put out by Casey’s brush off.

  
Derek returned her scowl with his signature smirk—something that had been half of what it used to be when Casey had left—and eyed the wig, “How did you even mange to take that with you.” It was even more ridiculous now then when he’d first seen her wear it.

  
“I had a few things packed ahead of time,” she muttered as the scowl turned into a glare.

  
Jason had trailed behind Casey and now the three of them stood in a kind of circle with Casey eyeing Derek and Jason eyeing Casey and Derek smirking at Casey. “Girlfriend?” Jason directed toward Derek.

  
“No,” the two said in unison and he couldn’t help but grin at her. The angry mask on her face slipped and she returned the grin before letting it slide back into place.

  
“Ex-girlfriend?” Jason tried again, and Derek shook his head.

  
“Just some lady who mistakenly sprayed me in the face with pepper spray.” He caught Casey’s eyes willing her to read his mind: I can do this. Jason thought this was hysterical and snickered at Derek’s misfortune. He watched as Casey slipped into a smile, again.

  
“I’m Jason,” he offered his hand and her blue eyes traveled over to Derek’s co-host.

  
“Casey,” she replied giving it a quick shake before turning his attention back to Derek.

  
That was how it had always been with them; it didn’t matter who was around, they would be too absorbed in whatever they had going on to remember that there were other people around. It had cost them both a few relationships along the way. Jason could tell he wasn’t getting anywhere with Casey and let out a breath, “I’m going to go get lunch, I’ll catch you later, D.” Derek gave him a wave and waited until he was gone.

  
“I do like you as a blonde.” His cheeky grin went unnoticed by Casey.  
“I’d like my password back, please.”

  
“I missed you, I missed my best friend,” he quoted her words back at her. They were true for him as well and he watched as she blinked rapidly before meeting his gaze.

  
“Derek, why are you making this harder?”

  
“Because, I missed you.”

  
The faux-blonde huffed in irritation and shook her head, “I know that… but what about everything else. Marti? Because being in my life, even if it was you as Derek Venturi and me as Casey Madison, would mean you not getting to see them because I can’t risk anyone else figuring out my secret…”

  
“I did some research, there are some family members who get to see their family traveling under a temporary false identity.”

  
“Yes, and it’s expensive and usually reserved for children of divorced parents for visitation.” She crossed her arms defiantly, “Beside, it’s for your safety, too. Being around me is dangerous, if I was ever discovered…” she trailed off, eyes now pleading with him.

  
“You could just talk to your handler, maybe she could figure something out. I went a year thinking you were dead and now, knowing you’re alive, I wouldn’t be able to go on as if you didn’t exist…”

  
They went back and forth, finally moving from the station lobby to a coffee shop down the street. Casey continued to be reserved and concerned and it wasn’t until Derek told her to stop mothering him, “I’m an adult now, too, Case, I can make my own decisions about what is and isn’t safe,” she’d tried persuading him with Marti and he’d shook his head, “She’d understand.” Because their whole family had been present when he’d convinced his love for her. He wanted to tell her now, what he’d confessed at her funeral, but he couldn’t make himself vulnerable like that faced with an actual opportunity.

  
“Do you not want me around?” He finally asked and Casey blanched.  
“Of course I want you around, but—“ he cut her off, tired of listening to all her ‘buts’.

  
“Then it’s settled. Call her.” And because he was always good at talking Casey into doing the things she really wanted to do, she did. Right in front of him called and left a message to meet up.

  
He had given her the password back, so they could ‘talk’ again, because she refused to give him her phone number. The message he got right before he was about to head to sleep made him wished he’d found a way to get it out of her.

  
_~_

  
_D,_

  
_She’s worried about a security breach. I’m sorry. My name is changing and I’m leaving again._

  
_C._


	6. Chapter 6

She’d told him this might happen; that she could choose to stay in the program or get out, but if she stayed and her identity had been compromised she would have to be relocated. She had told him and he hadn’t listened. He’d replied to her message asking when, but that had been an hour ago, she still hadn’t replied and he was growing anxious. They wouldn’t make her pack up and leave right now, would they?

  
He should have gotten that phone number from her then he could call her, talk to her, find her. All he had was her last name. Derek had no idea where Casey worked or where she lived.

  
It was desperation that led him to call the kid from the café, Brian. He sounded confused when he answered, but Derek wasted no time, “It’s the guy with the one that got away, the girl.”

  
“Oh yeah… why are you calling me?”

  
“I need her phone number,” there was a pregnant pause and he sighed, “It’s a complicated story but she has to move and I have no way to call her, to convince her to stay. I promise I’m not stalking her, I just didn’t get a chance to call her.”  
“Dude, I don’t know, beside the restaurant is closed… can I call you tomorrow?”  
“No, it’s an emergency… if she moves I may never get a chance to see her again.” On the other line Brian debated heavily before sighing.

  
“I can call my manager and see if he can get it, I guess she can always change her number if you are a stalker. Seriously, though, this is the last time I’m getting involved.”

  
Derek said his thanks and hung up. He was alternating between pacing back and forth in his small bedroom and refreshing the email page looking for a reply. She had told him that she was leaving, he had to take that as a positive that she wanted him to find her. It was thirteen minutes and twenty-two seconds when Brian finally called back. He’d been successful and had returned with a phone number. Derek sang Brian’s praises hoping that it was her cell and not a work number.

  
She answered on the third ring, “Hello?”

  
“Casey,” he breathed, not even bothering to hide his relief.

  
“Derek?” She sounded confused but, he hoped, a little relieved as well. “How did you…?”

  
“Never mind that. When do you leave?”

  
There was a pause and she sighed, “I leave to a safe house tomorrow, I don’t know where, and then a few days later I’ll be relocated to another city.”

  
“I wouldn’t compromise your identity…” He would never let anything happen to her.  
“I know that, but she doesn’t.”

  
“Where are you now?” He was dressing as they spoke and now had his keys in hand.

  
“I’m at home, packing.”

  
“Where,” he grunted, trying not to tip over as he balanced the cell between his ear and shoulder standing on one foot to get his shoe on, “is home?”

  
“Derek… you can’t come here.”

  
“Where, Casey?” He headed for the door, “I need you in my life, Case, we’re good for each other.” He was frozen, one hand on the door handle, waiting with bated breath.

  
“I’ll text you the address.” She said, finally.

She lived not twenty minutes in a cute one bedroom house. She had a small yard and two car driveway. He pulled in and parked next to her car before racing for the front door. He hadn’t even raised his hand to knock when he heard the sounds of the several locks behind undone, six clicks later and Casey was standing before him.

  
“Casey?” a woman’s voice came from behind him and Derek whirled around. She was dressed in neat slacks, a button down shirt, and a suit jacket and she was looking at Casey sternly. When Derek turned back to Casey she was looking slightly ashamed. The woman ushered them both inside, glowering at Derek, “Casey, you could be kicked out for this.”

  
“It wasn’t her fault,” Derek started but Casey held up her hand shook her head.  
“I know, but… Anne…” She was giving Anne a meaningful look and the woman sighed.

  
“If you weren’t such an important witness,” she huffed before turning to Derek, “Derek I presume?”

  
He nodded, mutely and shook the hand that she stuck out. She looked familiar, “You were at the funeral!” He realized suddenly and Anne shrugged one shoulder. “You were, in the very back. I saw you on my way… out.” If she’d been at the funeral, that meant she’d heard his eulogy. He was studying her now and she shook her head, giving him a sympathetic smile. He took that to mean that she hadn’t shared what was said with Casey.

  
“Anne, I just… wanted a chance to say goodbye, he already knows I’m alive.”  
“And if someone was following him, keeping an eye on him in case he happened to meet up with his supposedly dead sister?” Casey looked properly chagrined, but he recognized the way the stance she took. It was the one she took when gearing up for a fight, usually with him, a physical representation that she was going to stand my ground.

  
“I needed to say goodbye.”

  
“Is it completely impossible for me to enter into the program?” Derek interrupted and both women turned to look at him. Casey was narrowing her eyes at him but Anne looked surprised, “I know I didn’t actually witness anything but I know that family will sometimes be put into protection with the witness, but if I wanted to be a part of it, stay with Casey, is it impossible?”

  
“You’d have to cut off ties with your family, you’d have to move and leave your job…”

  
“I’d be willing to do it.” He said, ignoring the look that Casey was giving him and instead, staring at Anne, “I don’t want to ‘die’ per se because that would probably kill my parents, but I could cut myself off from them.”

  
“Let’s not jump the gun on anything… I’m not even sure if we can bring you in, sometimes the family is brought into protection with the witness… it just depends on the circumstances. I’m not sure if this is going to be one of those times, though, because it didn’t happen when we brought Casey into this.” Anne turned a frown on Casey.

  
“And if I say that I’ll find Casey, wherever you move her?”

  
“You would put your sister’s life in danger like that?”

  
“Step,” he and Casey both corrected together, automatically. He exchanged a tight smile with Casey before turning back to Anne who was trying hard not to look sympathetic.

  
“You could be arrested, you know,” She warned, “For endangering a crucial witness.” Derek thrust his arms in front of him, wrists turned upward and the agent laughed. “I will see what I can do.” There was a knock at the door then and she stopped to open it.

  
“All clear,” the woman’s partner advised before stepping through the narrow doorway, “That’s the brother, right?” He asked Anne, cocking his head toward Derek.

  
“Step,” he and Casey corrected again.

  
“You were at the funeral, too,” Derek realized. He had sped past him on his way out of the funeral home after his eulogy. Derek turned a particular shade of pink. Everyone in this room knew he was in love with Casey, except for Casey herself.  
“That makes more sense.” He nodded and gave Derek a knowing smile, he wasn’t sure what there was the man could understand about the predicament until he saw the way he looked at Anne when she had turned her attention toward her cellphone. The knowing smile was returned. Anne probably had no clue either, but when Derek glanced at Casey she grinned at him; she had seen the Look, too.  
“I guess I can show you around,” she said, softly gesturing around the general area. “Living room,” she pointed behind the couch where the kitchen could plainly be seen. She led him around Anne and the guy whose name was still unknown and pointed down a hall, “Bedroom, bathroom, and office. It’s too small to be really anything else.” She shrugged one shoulder.

  
“You decorated?”

  
She nodded, “Can’t you tell.”

  
“It’s not so Casey, it actually looks nice,” he grinned at her and she smacked his arm, “There’s a subtle Casey to it,” he amended.

  
“I grew up,” she reminded him, “Dying will do that to a person.” Case chewed at her bottom lip, trying not to laugh until she could gauge his reaction to her joke. He only made her suffer for a moment.

  
When her ‘tour’ was over she sat him down at a spot on a stool at the counter that, he realized, doubled as her dining table. Anne and the other dude, Timothy is his name, had gone outside and so it was the two of them. Casey made grilled cheese, apologizing for her lack of groceries as she did so. It wasn’t until she was seated next to him grilled cheese untouched before her, that she bothered asking the question that had been weighing on her mind. She also managed to wait until he was mid chew on a large bite of his sandwich. “Derek,” he looked up, “Why are you doing this?”

  
“I like food,” he answered, dumbly, mouth full. 

  
“Der-ek!” She reprimanded with a shake of her head. The look she gave him said she knew that he knew exactly what she was asking.

  
“I told you, I missed my best friend.”

  
“So, if this were Sam…”

  
He interrupted, “but it isn’t Sam.”

  
“Yes,” she seemed exasperated and that delighted him a little, “but if it were—hypothetically—you wouldn’t be doing this. You’d enjoy the time with him and be on your way secure in the knowledge that he wasn’t actually dead.”

  
He supposed this was supposed to be the point where he broke down and finally told her that he loved her. Technically speaking, they had past that point a long time ago and here was another opportunity… that he couldn’t take, “You don’t want me around?” He countered, instead.

  
“It’s not that, Derek, and you know it.” He enjoyed the way her eyes flashed irritably at him. He’d missed it, more so thinking that he’d never see it again.  
There was more she wanted to say but she didn’t get the chance, because there was a knocking on Casey’s door. She glared at Derek, for just a second, before going to answer it. He, the patient being that he is, waiting at the counter taking another large bite of his grilled cheese sandwich. That is, until he heard Casey scream cut off midway.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if things move a little slow, but i'm not a professional and this is fanfiction so, what can ya do.


	7. Chapter 7

Derek grabbed the handle of the pan Casey had just been using to cook with and hid around the corner, listening, “You don’t look the same…” muttered a male voice that Derek didn’t recognize. “Darker hair, thinner than they described…” There was some rustling that sounded like paper and then there was a quiet ‘oof’ and the sound of  something landing on the couch. “What’s your name, girl?” 

“Casey Madison.” She responded, automatically and Derek recognized the fight in her voice. 

“Same first name… but names are so easy to change these days. Where are you from, Casey Madison?” 

“Chicago,” Casey lied and Derek, had he never met Casey, might have believed her; she’d improved. 

“What are you doing moving from the Windy City to the rainy one?” 

“What are _you_ doing in _my_ living room?” Hissed Casey, and it was the same kind of animosity she’d shown Derek when they first met. Only, there was no enjoyment in the banter. 

“I’ve been watching you, Madison.” There was another sound of something landing  on the couch and Derek risked a peek around the corner. There was an unknown head sitting beside Casey on the couch, staring at her intently. “My boss has some friends in pretty high places, so we’ve been looking around for a girl who saw something she wasn’t supposed to see and said something she should have kept to herself.” He paused and Derek imagined that he was studying Casey, looking for a reaction. “We’re pointed here, as well as a few other places, our source isn’t perfect.” Derek saw one shoulder come up in a shrug. 

The man passes Casey something and she gives it a cursory glance before letting out a derisive snort, “Few similarities,” the paper was passed back and Casey gave a haughty toss of her head, “Eye color, maybe, but her nose is so…” she put a finger to the tip of her nose and pushed up. 

The stranger continued on as if she hadn’t said anything, what Derek assumed to be a picture of Casey was stuffed into his jacket pocket, “So I’ve been watching you trying to figure out if you’re the right person, and then wouldn’t you believe it? The girls brother shows up!” For once Casey bit back the ‘step’ bit and Derek figured it was a  good move. “Right on your doorstep.” He sounded way too pleased with himself and Derek could feel his teeth grinding. “And, if that wasn’t enough proof, a man and a woman follow him in, both carrying government issued weapons, the man going in only after doing a perimeter check.” 

Casey, who had begun fiddling with the couch cushion, a nervous tell of hers, suddenly jumped up and Derek was surprised to see a small pistol in her hand. Her arms were steady, keeping it locked on the man on the couch. He raised his arms in surrender, but then laughed mockingly, “You aren’t going to shoot me.” 

“Aren’t I?” She took half a step back and Derek saw the textbook stance, her aim was probably pretty decent, too. He wasn’t convinced, though, that she’d actually be able to shoot someone and even if she could he didn’t think she’d be able to live with herself. He crept forward, and even when he was in Casey’s line of sight she didn’t move her eyes from her target. 

“No…” the guy started but Derek swung and brought the still hot—oops?—frying pan down on the guys head. It was pretty heavy duty and so the guy slumped over immediately. Casey let out a breath and he looked up at her, waiting for her to freak out. Instead, she was suddenly very professional. She tucked her gun behind her back and then kicked a foot at the gangster. He didn’t move and she started searching his pockets. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Looking for weapons, in case he wakes up.” She stated it like it was obvious, and Derek supposed it kind of was. “Good thing Anne was worried about this,” she muttered. 

“I don’t follow.” 

“I don’t normally have people watching my house, Derek,” again stated like it was obvious. “Although…” she trailed off and finished her pat down of the guy on her couch. “Watch him.” She instructed before heading to the front door and peering out. “Still out there… must have snuck by…” she went back into the kitchen and dialed a number. Anne and Timothy let themselves in a minute later. 

Derek, meanwhile, hadn’t moved. He was still trying to process what happened, berate himself for putting Casey in danger, and trying to figure out when Casey became so put together. Granted, she’d always been a take charge kind of gal, hadn’t minded bossing people around to get things done, but this was so different. He was still expecting her to start hyperventilating or crying or… something. 

“Derek, are you okay?” Anne was asking while Timothy was quietly making calls in a corner. 

“Processing.” He answered and when he looked at her he was pretty sure he saw pity there, “I didn’t…” he took a breath, “I shouldn’t have…” 

“It’s  done.” And Derek liked her for that. She didn’t try to placate him and tell him it wasn’t his fault. “He snuck right by us and walked through the front door.” She shook her head and looked a little like he felt. 

Timothy walked over, tucking the phone into a pocket, “Casey said they got an idea about where she might be… there might be a problem home base.” He told Anne in a low voice. He didn’t try to exclude Derek, though. 

“So none of the usual safe houses, then.” Anne contemplated. Safe house? He looked between the two trying to follow and that’s when he realized that Casey was nowhere to be seen. Ah, maybe she’s having her freak out in private… he trailed over to the bedroom she’d pointed out earlier expecting to find her trying not to cry or taking deep breaths or pacing. 

Instead, he found her in the middle of packing a bag. There was another one ready to go by the door. “Hey,” She looked up at the sound of his feet. The tight lipped smile that she offered was the only indication that something was bothering her, otherwise it looked like she could be packing for vacation. 

“Case,” his voice cracked a little and she paused, “I’m…” 

“Don’t even say it, Derek.” 

“But,” she huffed and walked over to put a hand over his mouth. 

“Not your fault. No one’s fault. You didn’t lead him here, he was already here. He would have done what happened tonight at some point, even if you hadn’t shown up.” Up close he could see her shaking a little, though the hand across his mouth was firm and steady, “As much as I’ve always wanted to hear those two words out of you, not this time. Okay? If you hadn’t been here…” A shiver went down her spine and she let go. 

“I was just going to say I was hungry,” he answered weakly. It was all he could think of, but it succeeded in making Casey smile. 

When he'd returned to the living room, Timothy was back on the phone making calls and Anne was busy boxing up what kitchen supplies she could in boxes, "You got those fast." Anne looked over her shoulder and grinned, "Casey is always prepared." She pointed to a space between the fridge and counter and, sure enough, there were several boxes flattened out and tucked away. 

"Yeah, she is." 

Anne smiled at him and he really wished people would quit looking at him like that, but then it became sympathetic and he kind of wished she would go back to the way she'd been looking at him before, "So, it looks like now it won't really be an issue to join witness protection." She folded the flaps in on a box and turned to look at Derek, "There's no telling what he's told anyone else so now you're in danger and they know you live here... they could just watch you, waiting to see if you go to Casey again," here she gave him a stern look because she was betting he probably would try and find her again. "You have a choice, of course," 

"Can I stay with Casey?" 

"I think we can swing it." 

"I'm in." 

"I thought you might say that, my boss is already drawing up the paperwork." Normally he hated when people could read him so easily but this time he was relieved. They would be able to speed up the process just a bit. "We're going to take you and Casey to a safe house and later check to see if you're place is clear. If so, you'll be able to pack a few things... try and keep it to essentials. No personal items—photos, letters, anything with meaning—it could blow your cover." 

Casey came into the kitchen then and started taking things out of the freezer, "Casey, hon, you know we'll feed you." Derek watched as the back of her neck turned pink. 

"I know, I just... I had it ready just in case." 

"You meal prepped for going on the run?" He asked a little incredulous and a little amused. 

"Well, yes." She turned to look at the both of them, pink cheeked. "What? There's nothing wrong with being prepared."  

"Whatever you say, Roomie." Derek grinned and she crossed her eyes in return. 

"And I've gotten so used to living alone in peace and cleanliness," she sighed dramatically and it was Derek's turn to roll his eyes. 

"Yes, because freezing meals for on the run is the definition of living in peace." She just flapped a dismissive hand at him and turned to Anne, "I'm ready." 

He never thought he would see the day where Casey moved out of her home with nothing but two duffle bags and one cardboard box full of her things. As they drove away in the back of Timothy and Anne's car she let out a little sigh, "I did really like that place."


	8. Chapter 8

The safehouse was actually a one bedroom apartment. Timothy shrugged apologetically when he had unlocked the door and let them in, "It's the best we could do, considering." Considering they didn't know who could be trusted, Derek finished in his head. It was modest and not too cramped, the kitchen was stocked with the cookware and Anne had promised to get some groceries for a few days. Casey and Derek were not to leave the house. 

Casey had brought the smallest of her two bags with her and in it, he learned, was all of her stuff for a temporary stay like such. Apparently this bag stayed packed and ready to go so she could be ready to leave at a moment's notice. He was supposed to create a list of things he would need from his apartment because it looked like Timothy was going to be the one getting it all for him. Derek had taken a peek inside Casey's Ready Bag for some ideas. Socks, underwear, toothbrush, deodorant, travel size shampoo and conditioner, a few books, hair brush, mascara (her luxury item, she had explained when he had raised his brow at it). There were other items that were practical, a Swiss army knife, colored contacts which she admitted were probably unnecessary but, as usual, she wanted to err on the side of caution. She also had two boxes of different colored hair dye in there.  

Derek delighted in the fact that there was a box for blonde hiding in the bag as well. 

While Derek worked on his list (most of the items being copied from things he found in Casey's bag) she had disappeared in the bathroom. It only occurred to him to be worried when she had been in there for nearly thirty minutes. He was debating whether or not to go on and bug her when he heard the water turn on. He figured she was okay but mostly secure in the knowledge that she wasn't having gastrointestinal issues, he passed by the door, hand poised to knock. 

She was sobbing. 

The sarcastic comment on the tip of his tongue fell away. Somehow this cut him deeper than if she'd freaked out right after the thing with the gangster had occurred. He realized how alone she must have been for it to be in her nature now to hide the tears and panic until she was alone, in the shower. How alone she must have been to feel like she needed to hide whatever pain she was feeling until she was secluded. He knocked, "Case," he tried. 

The choking sobs faltered and he listened, ear to the door, while she tried to stop crying long enough to breathe so that she could speak, "Goodness knows you need a shower, Der, but you're going to have to wait." It was playful and their usual banter but there was no bite, no energy. She didn't want him knowing that she was crying. 

"No one needs a shower more than you, Spacey," he volleyed back. He had never been really good at the comforting thing, but this was normal for them and maybe, well maybe that's what she needed right then. "Just making sure you hadn't fallen," he continued. 

She laughed, a shuddering laugh but it was genuine, he was sure. She called him a name that he was certain he'd never heard come from his mouth before and then headed into living room to see if he could find some hockey on the tiny television provided. By the time Casey had finished in the bathroom he had, somehow, been sucked into something along the lines of some cheesy Hallmark movie and glanced up at her, briefly. 

Then he had to do a double take. Her hair, which had been down past her shoulder blades, was cropped short just above the shoulders. The black dye had been redone and she'd added streaks of dark blue throughout it all. It wasn't until she started fiddling nervously that he realized he'd been staring, "No good, huh?" She smiled, "Didn't think I could pull it off." She shook out her still wait hair. 

"It's different," he managed, "Not very Casey at all." There was the beginning of a pout forming on her face, "But you pull it off," he added quickly. "I like it." 

She eyed him suspiciously but he wasn't lying so none of the tells were there, "Well, it's temporary." She stood there for another second before coming to sit beside him on the loveseat. The blanket that had been draped on the back of the couch soon ended up around her shoulders and she sat, chin resting on her knee, staring at the TV. She wasn't actually watching the movie, he could tell, because there was not any kind of reaction from her. He became too busy watching her to focus on the movie. 

When it was over, he clicked the remote turning it off. They sat in the dark, he'd forgotten how late it was and hadn't had the forethought to turn on the light before turning off the screen. "Derek," he'd just started to move to find the light switch when she spoke. 

"Yeah?" 

"I would have shot him," her voice was void of all emotion. 

"I know, Case." 

"Probably in the leg or something, but I would have done it." 

"I know." 

"I would have hated myself for it, a little bit." 

"I know," and that had been why he had decided to hit the guy upside the head instead of letting her shoot the guy when it wasn't absolutely necessary. They sat quietly for another minute before a small hand slipped into his and he gave it a squeeze. 

He's not sure how long they ended up staying like that but eventually she yawned and he followed suit not long after, "bedtime," he said decisively. He felt, rather than saw, her head nodding beside him. They got up and together, still hand in hand, stumbled to the bedroom. "I'll just grab a pillow," he explained, "and sleep on the couch." 

He could practically hear her rolling her eyes when she responded, "Don't be silly. You can sleep in the bed. You're an adult, I'm an adult. Don't make it weird." So he kicked off his socks and crawled into bed beside her, focusing everything he had not to roll over and wrap an arm around her and pull her close. 

Still, one cannot control themselves in their sleep... which is how he woke up with his face buried in her hair, one arm tucked under her neck and the other holding her flush against him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one is so short... but fluff! And it just felt like a good note to end on.


	9. Chapter 9

Her hair smelled like strawberries and having her in his arms felt incredibly _right_ that he didn't want to move. He also wasn't sure if she was awake and did not want to face her discomfort when she realized that he was awake and still holding her. So, he kept his body relaxed and his eyes closed, pretending for just a while. 

Casey woke up not longer after he did; he'd estimated about thirty minutes had passed. She'd mumbled something, sleepily and rolled over in his arms, but she was no longer in deep sleep and the movement and his arm around her probably woke her up because she'd rubbed at her eyes and sat halfway up to look around at her surroundings before falling gently back on the bed. Derek wanted to hold his breath but he forced it to stay even and calm, though he was sure his heart was beating furiously. 

Casey stayed in his arms for another few minutes before she gently lifted  his arm off hers and tucked her pillow where she'd been. In what he hoped looked like an unconscious movement, he hugged the pillow tighter. He really did stop breathing when she ran her fingers through his hair and rest a hand on his cheek, briefly, before exiting the room. 

He didn't "wake up" until the smell of bacon creeped through the cracks in the door and he could hear soft voices in the kitchen. Wandering into the tiny kitchen, he ran his fingers through his hair and gave a generic grunt at the two people standing around. "He rises with the smell of bacon," Casey intones and, God bless her, sitting on the counter is already a plate loaded with two over easy eggs, toast, bacon, and even a little cup of fresh fruit. She laughed at the look on his face as he eyed the plate, "Yes, that's for you. I heard the door open," she explained further. 

"Thanks," he mutters and snatches up the plate and taking a bite of the bacon before eyeing the two strangers in the room. 

"Kevin and Andrew," she explained, interpreting the look, "They brought the groceries and replaced Anne and Timothy so that they could get some sleep." Her arched a brow in Casey's direction and she shrugged one shoulder, "Anne hand picked them." Again, correctly interpreting his expression: could they be trusted. 

Derek offered them a tight smile and then wondered to the sagging couch in the living room, "He's not really a morning person," Casey stage-whispered and he scratched the back of his head with his middle finger. He heard her giggle and smiled to himself. "I guess you don't want anymore bacon, then." She teased and he turned around to offer her apologetic puppy eyes. 

She just rolled her eyes in return but he assumed it was safe to say that he would still be getting bacon, "This is the brother, right?" One of the guys asked and he heard the automatic 'step' fall from her lips and he had to wonder if maybe she wasn't on the same page as him. Because they didn't detest one another like when they first met and it couldn't just be a habit now with so much time apart... He'd always been a confident (some would say cocky) guy and he'd always been able to read Casey pretty well, but when it came to his thinking toward Casey (because even thinking the word 'feelings' is too much) all of that went out the window. 

Derek was suddenly aware of an awkward silence behind him and he turned to see what had happened and the three of them were staring at him, expectantly. "What?" 

"Kevin asked what position you played?" There was concern etching her features and now that he was looking closer he could see that the stress from the day before was still there as well and he guesses that maybe he zoned out a little. Despite the piece of toast in his mouth Derek goes into a deep discussion with Kevin (from London, Ontario, who knew?) about his college hockey team. 

It was after breakfast when the two agents left to go patrol outside, or whatever it is they do, he's not really sure. "Andrew has the hots for you," he told Casey as she cleaned up, and really he's doing her a favor by not helping because it helps her de-stress. 

She snorts and shakes her head a little, "Way off the mark." She giggled and looked up from the sink to meet his eyes, "Of the two of us, I'm definitely the one he'd be least interested in." 

"What?" Then the realization dawned and he felt his cheeks warm. 

"He couldn't stop staring at your ass when you came in for breakfast." Derek rolled his eyes and turned to open the fridge to see what else had been brought in the way of groceries. 

As he was bent over he wiggled his but in Casey's direction, "Can't say I blame him." When he straightened and looked over at her she'd turned a little pink, too. 

"Honestly, when I met him I thought he'd have better taste." She sighed, "But he's certainly an upgrade for you." 

And that's how they spent the next three days in the apartment. They would bicker and wrestle over the remote, and Casey would cook and eventually he would be roped into cleaning (not really minding) complaining the whole time and verbally sparring with Casey. It was almost like university and he mostly enjoyed the experience, the only difference being the sleeping arrangements but he certainly wasn't complaining because though he was still waking up with his face buried in Casey's shoulder she hadn't lodged one complaint. Well, there was the complaint about the few, very minor, pranks that he'd pulled but that was par for the course. 

He hadn't been this happy in a little over a year. They would soon have a little two bedroom house (they would be sharing to save on costs) and in that time arrangements were made for his new identity (Casey had opted that he change his name to Dereka and he'd suggested she change hers to Klutzilla) and there was even a plan in place for him to get a quick explanation and goodbye in for his family. Casey, he knew, was extremely jealous of the fact that she wasn't going to get to see her mom (seeing how it was just going to be his dad and Nora and they would be left to explain everything to everyone else). He could see it in the way that her smile was a tad too tight whenever it was brought up. 

She had grown up, though, because she didn't act out about it like she would have in high school but it didn't stop him from being guilty and pulling Anne aside on the second night to see if she really couldn't bring Casey along. 

"I'm sorry, Derek, I really wish I could and I know she wants to but... they already think she's dead and it would be too easy for someone to slip and I'm already pushing it by letting you say goodbye but I'm a big ole softy underneath. Your parents have already been through a lot." The smile she gave him was sad and he'd nodded in understanding. He didn't want her to think he was ungrateful for what he was getting. 

Yes, he was being considerate, and if Casey knew she'd be taking an ad out in the paper. 

The day that he actually went to go see his dad and Nora, Casey made herself scarce. Derek didn't grudge her a little sulking. He knew how important family was to Casey and to have been completely cut off from them for a year and then be so close. Just before he left she hugged him fiercely, "You don't have to do this, you know. Witness protection, I mean." 

"I know." 

"Take a picture?" She pleaded, "We can delete it after just..." Casey trailed off and her face filled with the expression he had started to recognize as the one she made when she was really focused on not crying. He nodded and then Anne and Timothy were whisking him away into a darkened van leaving Casey behind with Kevin and Andrew. 

The ride was filled with all of the things he was not allowed to talk about with his parents. He was pretty much limited to telling them an edited version of what happened, giving them the cover story of where he would be since he wasn't 'dying' and saying goodbye. Still, it was better than what Casey got and that kept him from complaining... much. 

They met in one of those office buildings that housed several different kinds of businesses. The door said it was a real estate office and Derek was led into a large room with a board meeting style table inside it. His dad and Nora were already settled in and his mom arrived just as he did. 

Abby's arrival had surprised, but delighted him, and he figured Casey had said something to Anne about getting his mother there. Anne waited just outside of the glass and Timothy went roaming the hallways while he spent his fifteen minutes with his parents. Abby was the first to hug him, followed by Nora (both of whom—look at that proper English) were close to crying. "Derek," his dad started, "What is going on." 

Derek sighed heavily and ran his fingers through his hair before diving in, "I can't tell you much. Just... I'm going to be in witness protection. The official story is that I've decided to go into photo-journalism (his minor) and am traveling to third world countries for the story... I'll likely "die" not long after but considering everything that happened last year, I wanted you to know that I wasn't actually dead... but I won't be able to be in contact." He let that sink in has he found his way to one of the office chairs. 

"Ever?" Nora asked, her voice a little wobbly. He nodded and ran his hand through his hair again. 

"Why?" 

"I can't really talk about it." They had decided that they less he told them about why he was leaving, the better. Too much of the truth and it might slip about Casey, and for once he couldn't bring himself to lie and tell another story. 

George was studying his son, "Is it completely necessary... you can't just move or come back home...?" 

He shook his head again, "Life threatening and it could be dangerous for the rest of you if I didn't disappear." 

"But losing Casey and now you, despite at least having you alive..." Nora trailed off and sniffed, "It's still losing you and it's going to be hard on everyone and, oh, Marti..." He winced at that knowing it was coming. 

"She'll understand." 

"It won't make it easy." And Derek had to concede to that. The look on all their faces made him wonder if this had been the right decision. Him and his mom didn't talk much but they did talk and she was losing her son, regardless of the facts. For his dad and Nora they were losing a second child and, again, disregarding the reasoning behind it he was effectively going to be out of their lives. 

"I thought it would be better, knowing." He mumbled and Nora came over and wrapped him in a hug again. 

"It is, Derek, it is hard but there is some comfort in knowing that you are alive and well... and no matter what I will maintain the hope that you'll be able to return to your life at some point when everything is over." It was completely out of the realm of possibility but he figured that Casey testifying about a highly influential drug lord was going to mean that she would forever need protection. He had plans to stay with Casey as long as she'd let him. He'd let Nora have hope. 

There was a knock on the glass and Anne indicated her wrist watch and he nodded. Time was up. Nora released him so that he could hug his dad and then his mom. Nora was last. He wasn't supposed to but she looked so heartbroken that he couldn't resist whispering in her ear, "I'm going to be keeping her safe." She stiffened in his arms and he pulled away. Their eyes met and he gave one small nod. 

Suddenly Nora was sobbing and Derek looked around uncomfortably but before George could gather her up for comfort, she squeezed Derek one last time, "Thank you." And then she was in her husband's arms. 

"Uh, I guess I should have done this before there were tears," Derek shifted on his feet, "And I'll have to delete it as soon as I get back but... can I just get one last picture?" And so the three of them huddled together, offering each some source of comfort and Nora trying to wipe away the tears. It wasn't a happy picture, but he imagined Casey would be grateful it anyway. 

Then Anne was inside telling Derek it was time to go and he was once again in the dark van, probably never to see his family again. There was a part of him that felt a little empty but he couldn't bring himself to regret the decision. The ride back was quiet this time. There was nothing to run through and Anne seemed to understand that Derek wasn't in a conversational mood. 

He was, however, looking forward to seeing Casey. She would be able to relate to his pain and he could take some joy in fulfilling his favor to her. He could imagine the sad smile that would form on her face. 

Anne led the way to the apartment door, Timothy trailing close behind. It looked casual and Derek really admired their technique. Which is how he didn't notice Anne stop abruptly. Or the fact that the apartment door was wide open. He surged forward, needing to see Casey, but something jerked him back and he looked to see Timothy with a firm hand on his shirt, "You can't." His whispered tone was gentle but firm. He leaned close to Derek, "I know you want to go to her but we need to do our job." So Anne stayed with Derek while Tim went inside to check out the damage and make sure it was secure. 

The apartment was small and so he was back in just over a minute and he met Anne's eyes with his own scrunched in worry, "Kevin was shot in the back, Andrew is nowhere to be seen." 

Derek tried to peer around Tim and as terrible as he felt for Kevin, who was a pretty decent guy, he was more concerned about the one person who hadn't been mentioned, "And Casey?" 

Timothy wouldn't meet his eyes and that was all the confirmation he needed. "She's not here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, I'm thinking about getting a beta reader for this and/or other stories. I'm not sure how many people are reading my work, but it never hurts to have a second pair of eyes and I suck at proof reading my own stuff. So, message me if interested.


	10. Chapter 10

“What do you mean ‘she’s not here’?” Derek growled at Timothy, but then turned his heated gaze on Anne, “You picked out these guys and one can’t defend himself and the other one is missing leading me to believe he wasn’t the great guy that you thought him to be.”

“Derek, you need to calm down.” For some reason Anne’s calm demeanor just pissed him off more.

“Don’t tell me to calm down, my step-sister is missing!” He snapped and then he was being ushered inside.

Anne, who up until this point had always seemed real laid back and calm poked Derek in the chest, “When I say you need to calm down, you need to calm down,” She hissed. “There could be people  watching the apartment for when we return and you’re out there yelling and I get that you want to find Casey, I do to, but getting all pissed off isn’t going to help. I’m worried, too; I’m upset, too. This isn’t just a job, I was betrayed by someone I trusted and someone I took charge of protecting and keeping safe is gone. So, now I need to work and you need to sit down and shut up.” She gave him a gentle push and Derek, now standing with his mouth wide open in shock, dropped onto the couch behind him.

Now he got why she was put in charge of witnesses; he hadn’t seen it before but Anne was one scary chick.

 

Several hours later Derek had been relocated and he was sitting with Timothy while Anna made some calls outside. There hadn’t been any kind of evidence in the apartment to tell where Andrew and Casey might have gone. The thought had crossed his mind that Casey could be dead already but whenever he ever started thinking about it Timothy would shake his head at him, “Don’t go there, man.”

“Are you a mind reader or something?”

Tim chuckled and shook his head, “No, it’s just written all over your face. Beside, I’d be thinking the same things if I were in your shoes.” Derek pulled a face but decided not to continue the conversation; it wasn’t making him feel any better. Anne came into the hotel room the three of them were sharing and shook her head.

“Andrew hasn’t made contact with anyone, there’s still a chance he doesn’t know who he can trust or that someone is lying to me…” She looked a little defeated which worried Derek some.

“You’re not giving up?”

“No, we’re not giving up. Just have to think of something else.” The phone went off in Anne’s hand and she sighed, tiredly. “Hello?” She picked it up, already heading outside to speak privately. Instead of continuing to the door, she froze, “Casey?”

Derek perked up and he was standing next to Anne while Tim rushed to her other side, “Is she okay?” he whispered and Anne gave him the ‘one second’ finger. He shifted on his feet, impatient to know that she was okay.

“Where are you?” The only response Anne had to whatever Casey said was a raised brow. “Alright… yeah.” She hung up the phone and Derek couldn’t ignore the irritation that flared at not being able to talk to her.

“Is she okay?”

“Hm? Yeah, she said she ran but lost she lost Andrew. Timothy is going to get her and I’ll stay here with you. She’s at a Wendy’s.” She gave the address to her partner who didn’t hesitate in leaving. Anne peeked out the hotel windows.

“That’s like fifteen miles from here,” Derek realized.

“Mhmm.” Anne murmured, still sounding distracted. She was still looking outside the window and after a minute looked away, all business. “Alright. Grab your stuff.”

“What?”

“Grab your stuff,” She told him again, packing up everything, “I’ll explain on the way.” For once Derek did what he was told and yanked up his bag while Anne grabbed hers and Tim’s. She ushered him quickly into the backseat and then hopped up front of the beat up sedan she’d driven over.

“Now will you tell me what’s going on.”

“I think I know who the mole is,” She said quietly, looking over her shoulder as she backed out of the parking space and pulling out of the parking lot with more speed than Derek thought the car was capable of. “Casey told me a little about what happened at the apartment. Apparently Andrew got a phone call; the volume was loud enough that she could hear some of the conversation. The voice said hey, how’s it going Andrew said everything was fine,” Anne took a sharp right. “Andrew hadn’t said anything else but the voice said ‘yeah, go ahead and pick us up something to eat we should be leaving soon’ Andrew said ‘okay’ and they ended the call.”

They stopped at a light and Anne met his eyes in the review mirror; he realized that she looked hurt, having caused that some expression on Casey’s face more time than he cared to admit. “While you were talking with your parents Tim called Andrew and Kevin to make sure everything was going okay over there. The conversation Casey overheard was the conversation that Tim had while on the phone. She thought it was weird and she’s grown rather distrustful so she excused herself to the restroom and slipped into the bedroom to climb out the window.”

The light turned green and Derek forced his hands to relax where they’d been clenched into tight fists. Tim had been there, pretending to take care of Casey and pretending to care about him when he was a dirty traitor. “Why didn’t you just… turn him in, or whatever?”

“I don’t know who else he might be working with, Derek, you don’t get it. This guy we’re after is a Big Deal,” he could practically hear the capitals, “but it also means he has a lot of influence which is why it has taken him so long to get caught.”

“But, if Tim is the mole why didn’t he sell out Casey sooner?” He watched her shrug one shoulder.

“Maybe he just recently gave in to whatever he was being offered… I don’t know, Derek, all I know is my partner of six years betrayed me and our charge.” She didn’t look up to meet his eyes this time and Derek could feel for her.

“I’ll kill him,” he muttered under his breath. “Where’s Casey now?”

From his spot in the passenger seat he could see her cheek twitch up in a smile, “A strip club.” Despite the bizarre turn his life had taken and despite what he’d just learned, Derek laughed. 

 

* * *

When they pulled up Anne deliberated for a moment before sighing and telling Derek to come with, “Can’t leave you alone out here,” She grumbled. On the way over she’d called a friend to borrow their car and he was waiting for them, leaning against the wall of the building.

“Something to do with your job that you can’t talk about?” he sighed. Anne smiled sweetly and passed the guy her own keys.

“Thanks, Vance.” She said, instead and the guy grumbled something ‘you owe me’ before heading toward Anne’s car. Derek said nothing just waited impatiently for them to head inside and get Casey to safety.

Anne led the way and once inside they both scanned the seats for Casey. Derek spotted her first, sitting alone in a corner with a drink in her hand. He pointed her out and Anne smiled, proud, “I’ve taught her well.” Casey had spotted them as well and he saw her shoulders visibly relax. The drink, which Derek noticed was completely full, was placed on the table and Casey lay a few bills beside it before slinking through the customers and meeting up with him and Anne by the door.

Derek didn’t hesitate in pulling Casey in a hug and after a moment’s hesitation, she returned it. “Don’t scare me like that again,” he muttered into her ear and she felt her nod. He let her go but caught her hand in his, instead.

She looked over at him confused and then just shook her head, once, before the trio headed outside, “Where’s Tim?” She asked, noticing that the other agent was waiting outside.

Anne ushered them both toward a nondescript black Toyota, “I think he might have been the guy on the phone with Andrew and,” she glanced at her phone in her hand, “Judging by the fact that he hasn’t called from his wild goose chase I’m probably right and he knows that we know.

 

* * *

 

They drove around in silence for a while, Derek sitting in the backseat with Casey still holding her hand. She fell asleep, exhausted from the events of the day and he didn’t bother her. In the front seat he could see Anne and the clench of her jaw. She explained that until they knew who they could trust she couldn’t tell anyone that Tim was the mole which meant that he was bound to point the blame on her, “At least that’s what I would do,” and therefore they couldn’t go anywhere she would normally opt to go. She’d stopped at the first gas station they had come across and pulled out most of the money in her bank account but she hadn’t been sure where to go from there; all the places she thought to go Tim knew about and would eventually check.

They ended up checking into a No-Tell Motel (also known as a pay by the hour) that, due to privacy reasons, didn’t have cameras in the lobby or parking lot and was nowhere near any of Anne’s usual go-tos. When Anne checked them in and passed over the cash the employee behind the desk leered at the three of them and Derek found himself wanting to punch the guy in the throat for what he was implying about their little group. Instead, to Derek’s surprise, Casey winked at the guy and then followed Anne to where their room was waiting.

“Derek, you can let go of my hand now,” She told him, face turning pink, when they’d gone inside and Anne had locked the door behind them. He felt his own face heat up and he let go of Casey’s hand choosing to sit on one of the cheap beds, instead.

That night the three of them alternated taking turns sleeping in the double bed provided, although there was constantly some kind of noise coming from the rooms on either side of them. Anne, the professional, ignored them completely. Casey tried to pretend that they weren’t there but he could see her fidgeting; the place was dirty and being able to hear what was going on next door was freaking her out, he could tell. When he touched her shoulder to tell her to try and get some sleep, she jumped a mile high. “Just me,” he chuckled.

She narrowed her eyes at him, “You would find this,” she gestured to the room they were in, “Amusing.

“Nah, just your reaction.”

They sat in silence before he asked if she wanted to take the bed. “Nah, Anne can get some sleep. I’m too wired and she’s going to need the rest.”

Anne tried to protest but Derek promised that they would wake her if anything, no matter how small, seemed out of place. When he was sure that he’d fallen asleep Derek nudged Casey with his shoulder, “I was really worried today.”

She smiled at him, “I’m glad you were here.”

“Yeah?”

She nodded, “I missed you.”

“I would miss me too,” he intoned and Casey rolled her eyes.

“Hey, Case?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”


	11. Chapter 11

The silence was deafening. Until now Derek had kind of thought that the phrase was just some cliché writers used but never really understood that a silence could actually be  _ so loud _ . 

“Casey?” he whispered, tentatively. She was looking at him with blank eyes.

“Yeah?” She repeated, sounding out of breath.

“I, uh…” God, she wasn’t going to make him say it again, was she? He didn’t talk about feelings.

“Derek?” She said, gently and when he met her eyes again he saw tears forming.

“Aw, shit, Case. Don’t cry. I didn’t… I mean… we can… just… don’t cry, Case.” The brunette wiped at her eyes hurriedly.

“Sorry, I just… never thought we’d get our feel good family moment.” She still sounded breathless and her words came out a little strangled. Derek felt his stomach twist uncomfortably and he frowned, leaning back against his chair.

He had put himself out there and she was still looking for  _ familiar _ . He had given up his job, their family for her and she couldn’t see that he meant something a little more, “I don’t think you get it, Case.” his own voice sounded strangled as well, harsh. She looked at him, confused, “I  _ love _ you, god and you’re making me say it again like once wasn’t enough… I’m  _ in _ love with you.” Just in case she still wasn’t clear.

“Oh.” She squeaked, still sounding like she was out of breath.  _ Oh _ ? He opened his mouth to say something, honestly he wasn’t sure what, but Casey cut him off with a hand. Casey had started taking deep breaths, and god damn it wasn’t that big of a deal.

“It’s not like we’re related.” Because, duh.

“I know.” And really this girl might be the death of him.

“I just… I thought you were dead once, and then today… and I think…”

“So you just said it because you thought I was dead?”

“Yes,” he felt relieved; she was talking she was… not looking happy and maybe that wasn’t the right answer. The deep breaths started again.

“It’s just… the situation.” She excused.

“No, Case.”

“No, really. There’s a whole phenomenon about people who have heightened feelings toward another person when the two experience a rush of adrenaline together; it’s a similar thing, I suppose.”

“Casey,” he tried, again.

Her eyes were starting to brim with tears, “No, seriously. They did a whole study and like, this one guy would ask for phone numbers on a rickety bridge and then in a safe position and he got more numbers while on the bridge, which isn’t like a huge ground breaking experiment but there have been more.” If he were still trying to be a player this would be useful information but the only person he wants is the bundle of crazy sitting before him.

“Casey,” he said, a little more urgently. She smiled weakly at him, “It’s not adrenaline. I’ve loved you for a very long time. I confessed at your funeral…” Why were they still talking about this? If she wasn’t interested, couldn’t they just move on and forget?

“Oh,” The squeak had returned.

“Well, that was also a very emotional time…”

“Casey, stop trying to explain it away. You don’t feel the same but we can just pretend this conversation never happened? I just didn’t want anything to happen and have you never know.”

Perhaps he’d imagined the spark between them all those years and perhaps he misread the one person he’d always been able to read. There was a chance she wasn’t ready to confront her feelings but that wasn’t a road he wanted to travel down because it smelled too much of hope when there was obviously very little.

“Hey, Derek.” She interrupted his contemplation.

“Yeah?”

“I love you, too.”

It was… not what he expected. He thought they’d be in the middle of a fight and her obliviousness would push him over the edge until he confessed or did something stupid like kiss her like always happened in the movies (not that he watched those kinds of movies but  _ she _ did and he watched her). He’d thought that if they ever got to this point that there would be some kind of big spectacular… something.

Instead, they were sitting in a dingy pay-by-the-hour motel running for their lives and he was grinning like an idiot. She’d turned a brilliant shade of pink and he was sure he had the dumbest look on his face and he could absolutely just kiss… his thought was interrupted. “You guys are cute and all and I’m thoroughly relieved that, that confession has happened but please don’t start making out.” Anne sounded amused and Casey went from bright pink to a deep red.

“I thought you were asleep,” Derek muttered accusingly at Anne.

“I was getting there, but something more interesting was happening.” She sat up, looking relieved to find them in their respective seats and not locked at the mouth, “you’re so dense.” She told Casey, affectionately.

“I… what?” Sputtered the other woman.

“Feel good family moment,” Snorted the older woman and Derek grinned like an idiot.

“I didn’t… I thought… I just didn’t want to misunderstand and…”

Anne waved away the thought, grinning and for a moment Derek could pretend that their lives weren’t in danger. The three of them found something dumb to watch on TV (well Anne and Casey watched and he watched Casey, but he’ll deny it vehemently) and it felt safe.

Eventually Casey fell asleep and Derek had been in and out for the past few hours. He had woken up, again, to Anne whispering quietly by the door. “Yes, they’re both asleep.” There was a short pause, “He doesn’t know anything, just Casey.” at the mention of Casey’s name Derek became a little more awake. He kept his eyes closed, but listened intently.

“No, I don’t think he will be any trouble.” There was a longer pause this time, “I know but now Tim knows…” she cut off and sighed, “Yes. Yes, I’ll put it in the water.” There was another pause and Derek made sure he kept his breathing deep and even. “Yes, okay… okay… bye.” He heard her moving back closer to them and he felt Casey’s hand slip, which had stayed in his when they’d fallen asleep, give him two tight squeezes.

Suddenly Derek wasn’t so sure that they could trust Anne anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long! It was kind of hard for me to write, for some reason, and I hate trying to force it. So, uh, I feel like chapter is kind of shitty but hopefully whatever comes next won't be. Thanks for reading!


	12. Chapter 12

Derek didn’t sleep at all that night and Casey hardly slept any, either. Anne paced the room but never once woke them up to switch watch. Around eight, Derek finally faked his waking up and sat up to stretch. “Hey,” he accused and watched as Anne spun around to face him. He knew that look: Guilty. “You didn’t wake me.” He kept calm and her face transformed into a smile.

“I thought you two would need your rest. Now that you’re awake, should I go and grab us some breakfast?” Derek didn’t need to answer because his stomach growled, answering for him. “I’ll take that as a yes. Don’t answer the door for anyone.”

He resisted the urge to roll his eyes and just nodded, “Yeah, okay.” She grabbed some of the cash and headed out the door. When the door closed behind her, he sighed. He felt Casey stirring beside him and she was suddenly in motion. “Case?”

“We have to go.” she murmured, packing her few belongings. He’d watched her life dwindle down from an apartment of items to a few bags, to a simple backpack. The thin woman paused in her packing to give him a look, brow raised. “Well?”

He nodded. Right. Anne couldn’t be trusted now. “Should we call Timothy?”

Casey shrugged, staring at the rest of the cash that Anne had left behind. “I don’t know who to trust anymore.” She said flatly and after another second of hesitation, she grabbed the cash. “Come on.” She grabbed his hand and after peering out the peephole she dragged him alongside of her. She didn’t say anything so he stayed silent, keeping an eye out for Anne’s borrowed car.

Derek relaxed when he saw a bus just stopping a few feet in front of them. Casey picked up her pace as did he until they were at the doors of the bus. It was idling, the driver probably had seen them coming. He tipped his hat as Casey paid their fair and the two found a seat somewhere in the middle, “Case?”

“Hmm?”

“Where are we going?”

She was silent, blue eyes staring in the distance, deep in thought. He didn’t think she was going to answer so he started staring out the window trying to read street signs so they’d have some idea of where they were, at least. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s better not to have a destination. Harder to follow that way, no?” She wasn’t looking at him and Derek squeezed her hand, still entwined with hers.

“For now.” Derek sighed, “What I don’t get is why she would wait until now if she was working with whatever gang activity you saw…”

“The trial is approaching.” She finally settled her gaze on Derek and he wished he could wipe away that feeling of betrayal. “The best I can guess is that I was being kept alive for some reason, maybe killing me too soon would have pointed fingers too easily--I don’t know. But with the trial approaching, time is running out.” Casey shrugged one shoulder and returned to looking across the aisle from them.

Something out there must have caught her eye, though, because before Derek had a chance to say anything else she’d pushed the little button indicating they wanted to get off at the next stop. A few more feet and the bus slowed to a stop, Casey hurrying off and dragging Derek off once more. She started toward the direction the bus had just come from her pace quickening. “Case?”

But he didn’t need an answer because she made a sharp left and had pulled him into a greyhound bus station. She deliberated for a moment before releasing Derek’s hand, “Wait here.” She murmured and went to stand in line for tickets. She started chatting up the guy in front of her; she was smiling, touching his arm, tossing her hair. It was weird for him to see her flirt without falling over. A moment later the guy handed over a cell phone and Casey stepped out of the line to make a call. When she returned the phone, the guy let her step in front of him putting her next in line.

Derek waited, patiently, waiting and when she returned she had two tickets back to Washington. He raised a brow, and Casey shrugged again. “I called Timothy. He was at the WITSEC home office and I spoke with the Chief Marshall or whatever they’re called,” she waved a hand at the likely mis-assumption of the title. “They’re arranging to pick us up…” she glanced at the tickets in her hands, “In just a few hours.”

“Are you sure we can trust them.”

He watched as she nervously chewed at her lip, “They can’t all be bad, right? If we’re with them Anne will have less of a chance of finding us… she’s probably already looking for us.” Casey sighed and tugged at her shortened hair.

“Time to dye it again?” he mused, with a smirk.

“I bet you’re just dying for me to go with the blonde?” When his grin widened she swatted him, playfully, in the arm but laughed. Her smile was bright and Derek couldn’t resist the urge to gather her in his arms.

“We’ll figure this out.” he whispered, and she nodded against his chest. When his stomach rumbled, again, she disentangled herself still laughing. Without a word she went over to the vending machine and spent quite a few dollars to bring him back an assortment of candies and snacks.

“It’s the best I could do,” she offered by way of explanation before placing a sudden, yet gentle, kiss on his cheek. He felt his cheeks color but he offered Casey a genuine smile.

“I’m so glad I found you, again.” he murmured.

“Yeah, me too.” And then they split into the snacks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! I know it's been a while since I've posted but my wedding is just one week and a day away so I've been very, very busy. At any rate, here is a chapter so you know I haven't given up on this story. Hopefully after the wedding I can get back to a semi-regular posting schedule. Sorry it's not long or super interesting, but it will get the story moving again. Thanks for reading!


	13. Chapter 13

rriving back in Tacoma had been strange, but it had been a short-lived visit. By the time Timothy picked them up in a rental car he already had a flight booked for their new destination. Derek felt odd around Timothy having believed just 24-hours ago that he was the one threatening Casey’s well-being but there was no faking the hurt he saw in Timothy’s eyes when he saw them.

What Derek had thought had been betrayal and hurt on Anne’s features was actually annoyance or frustration at her careful plans being ruined. At least, that’s what Derek speculated. 

“We’ve already started on arrangements for a new location.” Timothy had told them before they were even in the car and they were whisked away to Wimberley, Texas. It was a little town somewhere in between Austin and San Antonio, boasting a population of 2,626 (now 2,2628). It had a bit of a tourist draw to it and it was far South from where they were currently being hunted. They moved into their little apartment as Mr. Derek Daniels and his wife Casey Daniels, a newly-wed couple from Denver, Colorado. Derek now loved the Denver Broncos and knew absolutely nothing about Hockey--probably the hardest thing in this whole ordeal, giving up watching his favorite sport.

Only three people knew where they were located: Timothy and their new agents, Mia and Jacob.

If Derek had met Mia and Jacob for any other reason he’d have no reason to think these two were government agents. They were friendly, loud, and when they were off duty both could drink like sailors. When they first picked up Casey and Derek they were completely professional, though, so even though they didn’t always seem like it, he knew they were taking their job seriously.

Three months after moving to Texas Casey and Derek married for real, their only guests the three people they could trust, and they upgraded to a little three bedroom house with a large back yard. He bought a barbeque pit and learned how to make Texas Style barbeque--brisket is now a word in their vocabulary. Casey took up writing and after taking a few peeks at some of what she’s written, Derek was pretty sure that she was going to publish.

Six months after they were married, Timothy arrived in Texas to escort Casey and Derek back to Canada for the trial. The flight was quiet, Casey fiddling with the ring on her finger, staring out the window of the plane. Casey was the star witness, so when she finally landed they were heavily guarded at all times. Derek was a potential, but not likely witness. He was there when the guy broke into Casey’s home in Tacoma, and the Assistant District Attorney had said he might be needed. Mostly, though, she focused on prepping Casey whenever they spoke.

 

* * *

 

They were sitting in the courthouse with him, Casey, and Timothy secluded in a witness room. They had woke up in the hotel early that morning and Casey had hardly said a word, though Derek had prodded and antagonized. Thirty minutes into their arrival at the court, Timothy leaned over and quietly whispered to Casey, “Are you ready for this?” Out of the corner of his eye he saw Casey nod before peeking around, nervously.

Casey reached over and squeezed her old handler’s hand. “Any news?” Both Timothy and Derek knew exactly what she was asking about. The few times that Casey had spoken with Timothy since their move she’d always wanted to know one thing: Had they heard anything about Anne. The mention of it, though, caused his eyes to fill with sadness and Derek couldn’t imagine how he felt, being betrayed by his partner and the woman he loved.

The older man shook his head and Casey frowned. When Tim looked up he met Derek’s eyes. They hadn’t been able to find Anne since they left the motel but he the look on Timothy’s face had Derek starting to think maybe they’d been keeping something from him and Casey.

He waited until Casey left to the bathroom before bringing it up. “You sure you don’t know anything? It doesn’t seem like her to just… give up.” He eyed Timothy suspiciously, suddenly distrustful.

Timothy held Derek’s gaze before sighing. “They found her body two nights ago.”

He was starting to understand why they were keeping it from Casey. Despite the betrayal, Case had been close to the agent. It also explained the look on Timothy’s face the past couple of days; he’d just assumed it had to do with the trial. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too.” They sat in silence for another minute. “Her mom was sick.” He said finally.

Derek made some noise of affirmation and Timothy continued. “Anne, she wasn’t a bad person. A large part of me hopes that maybe she was doing bad things for the right reasons… she needed the money, you know.”

Derek had to wonder if he would do the same… betray an innocent life you were sworn to protect to save a family member. 

“I’d like to think that,” Casey interrupted, sitting beside him. Neither of them had her re-enter the room. “It’s easier than thinking all the kindness was never real.” She smiled when Derek wrapped an arm around her. On his other side, Timothy nodded.

They were interrupted when the lawyer approached. “Mrs. Venturi, they are ready to call you to the stand.” Derek started, for a moment, at hearing the use of Casey’s real name, but he remembered that no one had been given their new names, opting instead to give them the names they would have had outside of this crazy mess.

“We’ll be just inside,” he assured her when she gave him a nervous glance. He smoothed out the worry lines with a gentle kiss to the forehead and then she went with the lady (whose name Derek had already forgotten) while he and Timothy quietly entered into the back of the courtroom.

Given all the trouble that Casey had gone to in order to stay alive and be there for the trial, he thought that her testimony would be longer. The first part, though, was over in just under ten minutes. Casey had pointed out the defendant as the one who she’d seen that night. Derek thought she was a good witness, but supposed he might be a little bias.

As soon as the Crown counsel sat down, the defense attorney stood, pacing in front of Casey. Her questions were sharp and harsh, trying to discredit Casey as a witness but his wife maintained her story. She stayed cool and collected as she explained the attempts on her life; the two Derek had been aware of, and a few more from before he was back in the picture. She’d never mentioned those, but he supposed he never had asked.

The defense didn’t appear even close to being finished  when the judge recessed for the afternoon. Derek and Casey were quickly escorted out of the courtroom through a different door than the one they’d come in and minutes after the recess had been called Timothy was pulling out of the parking lot speeding toward their hotel. Derek sat in front and when he turned to look at Casey she was trembling. “Casey, baby?”

She looked at him, blue eyes wide. “I’m okay, that was just…” The brunette trailed off and stared out the window. “It’s weird seeing someone who you watched murder another person, who hired people to try and kill you… and for him to sit there and completely lack remorse.”

 

* * *

 

Casey didn’t say much that night in their shared hotel room. The next day went much the same. They had breakfast and Timothy escorted them into the courthouse. This time, though, they didn’t have to wait very long for Casey to be called onto the witness stand. The defense was continuing his interrogation from the day before.

Derek paid more attention to his wife this time and he could see the spark of frustration behind her eyes as she answered each question with an even tone. “I’m positive that it was your client, counselor.” 

“How can you be so sure? Have you ever seen this man before that night?”

“Until that night, I had never met the defendant, as you asked me yesterday. However, that is a face that has been haunting my nightmares for almost two years now. I remember looking right in his face as I realized that he had just put ended the life of another human and I remember his face staring back at me when he realized he wasn’t alone. There was not a single moment of hesitation when he put the gun to that man’s face and shot.”

Timothy leaned over as Casey continued, “His lawyer just made a mistake.” Timothy nodded toward the jury. There were a few who kept their expressions blank, but a majority of them looked horrified as Casey described what she’d seen that night, in more detail than the day before. “He’s let her get too much information in.”

“No further questions,” the lawyer muttered before taking his seat.

“Re-direct?” The judge asked the prosecutor.

She rose and shook her head, “No, your Honor, the prosecution rests.”

Casey was excused from the witness stand and Derek and Timothy met her back in the witness room. She was shaking again.

They didn’t wait around to see how the rest of the trial went. Casey was done for the day so Timothy took them back to the car. They were quiet for only a minute before Casey leaned forward. “Can we see my parents?” She asked, eyes watering.

Timothy didn’t answer, just kept driving. Casey sat with her face between the front seats for another minute or so before sighing and leaning back into the seat. Derek couldn’t blame her for asking, and he was sure that Timothy didn’t, either. It was hard, leaving their family behind, but it was harder being so close to them and not being able to see them. Casey never had the closure of saying goodbye, either.

“Your parents live a few hours from here, yes?” Timothy asked Derek who nodded. “Call your dad and have her mom meet him at his office for lunch. I can give you five, maybe ten minutes of actual conversation.”

In the backseat Casey gasped and threw herself forward, giving Timothy an awkward hug. “Thank you.”

 

* * *

 

George was surprised to get a call from a blocked number but further surprised that it was his son on the other line. He seemed confused at the request to invite Nora over to the office for lunch, without an explanation. When Timothy, Casey, and Derek pulled into the parking lot, though, Nora’s car was there. “Ten minutes.” Timothy warned, walking them to the door. He stayed outside, though, while the couple went inside.

Casey hyperventilated the drive over and was continuing to have trouble breathing the closer they got to George’s office. “It’ll be fine,” He murmured in her ear and she nodded. They stopped just in front of his dad’s office. George’s secretary looked up at the young couple and smiled, “Sorry, he’s not in at the m… Oh, Derek! How nice to see you.” Her smile became more genuine, “and who is this with you?” Casey was hardly recognizable with the blond hair cut short to just below her ears and the deep tan she’d gained from living in the south. Mrs. Higgins, who didn’t have the greatest memory to begin with, didn’t even seem to consider that the dead daughter of Nora and George was standing before her.

“This is my wife.” He winked at Mrs. Higgins, “I came to introduce her to my dad and Nora.”

The older woman wagged a finger at Derek, “You know they’re going to be so upset that their wasn’t a wedding.” Derek just grinned as she picked up the phone and dialed for his dad. “Your son is here to see you and he brought a… guest.” George said something on the other line and then the door opened.

“Der-” He sounded relieved, at first when he caught sight of his son, but George stopped when he caught sight of the woman standing beside him.

“Dad! Great to see you. I know it’s been a long time, no need to stare.” He ushered himself and Casey past his dad, never letting go of her hand. Once inside his dad shut the door behind them.

“Casey!” Nora was crying, already, and she’d thrown her arms around her eldest daughter. Derek quietly disentangled himself from the mess of tears. Crying, still not his thing.

“Derek,” George said, quietly and he looked up sheepishly at his dad.

“What? I hinted to Nora the last time I saw ya’ll that she was alive.”

“I think there is more of an explanation required than ‘I hinted.’” The older Venturi paused, “Did you just say ‘ya’ll’?” He felt his ears turn pink.

“Yeah, I guess I’m picking some things up in our new home.”

“Our home?” Interjected a teary eyed Nora. It was only a moment later before she noticed the ring on her daughter’s hand. “You got married?” 

Casey squirmed, uncomfortably. “We didn’t really have a big wedding… it didn’t feel right to us, since we couldn’t have all of you there, too.”

“You got married to  _ each other _ ?” Nora squeaked. She let go of her daughter, choosing to fall into a cushy chair instead. “You  _ died _ so you could marry each other.” She concluded a second later.

“No, no. Mom… maybe I’d better explain from the beginning… but we don’t have long.” Casey, the person Derek knew could drag out the smallest story into an hour, made quick work of her tale: the murder, being swept up into witness protection, running into Derek, having to relocate and Derek’s decision to relocate with her, rekindling a previously unconfessed loved, and their move to their new location, which she did not specify, all told in 8 minutes.

At some point Nora sniffed and asked if there were any wedding pictures. They’d taken two, one at the courthouse right after it had become official, and one sharing a box of cupcakes they’d bought that afternoon. Casey had icing on her nose and was laughing at Derek who’d put it there.

“You look happy,” Nora sniffed and started crying which got Casey crying. Derek’s phone buzzed.

“Sorry, but we have to go now…” It was probably the last time they’d get to see their parents, let alone talk to them. The hugs were long and somber. When Derek hugged Nora he made the same promise to her that he had all those months ago, “I’m going to take care of her.”

She was still crying when they left the office and so was Casey, but she seemed lighter somehow. Timothy met them at the door and gave a little grimace at Casey’s face. Derek laughed and she stuck their tongue out at both of them. Inside the car Timothy turned so he could look at both of them. “The jury was sent out for deliberation about an hour into our drive. They came back within twenty minutes with a guilty verdict.”

Casey sagged against her seat looking the most relaxed Derek had seen her his entire life, particularly since he’d met her during her new life. Timothy smiled at them, but it fell just as quick. “Unfortunately this is just going to anger his followers, Casey, you’re still in danger and we have to recommend you stay within the program.”

Derek thought about their little three bedroom house in Texas and the fact that he couldn’t actively support a hockey team and he thought about their family. Moving back home would put all of them in danger. He looked at Casey who, naturally, had already come to that same conclusion. “I think we agree on that.”

His wife nodded, but she was crying and he wondered if maybe their impromptu trip to see their parents had been a mistake. “Case…”

“I’m pregnant, Derek.”


End file.
